Country opry

If they get dove hunting on Wii. I'm buying it. I have a bruise in the shape of West Virginia and the diameter of a soft ball on my shoulder. It does not feel as bad as it looks.

I shot 7 boxes of shells and killed 7 dove and 1 pidgeon. That is not very good. The new shotgun MUST be defective.

Meat office joke of the week:

Do you know what a wife does after she gets back from the battered woman's shelter?

The @#$%in dishes if she knows what is good for her.

Meat office drama of the week:

Our hero, let's just call him Steve because that is his name, has a new project. He is trying to help a 22 year old woman named Kristina get out of living at the crack house with no electricity or hot water. Basically, Steve wants her to move in with him. I reason that trading crack heads for one pot head might be a step up. I'm encouraging the union. There I go again, playing match maker. Steve laments to me every moment about Kristina when he is in my presence. It is a beat down.

There is more. Evidently, Kristina has 2 children in CPS custody and is trying to get them out. According to Steve, she has chosen to stay at the crack house because if she moves in with another man and changes addresses the CPS will not give her the children back. AT least that is her current excuse to Steve. I said, "I think she is just playing hard to get."

Week 1 of the NFL

The Cowboys have yet to kick off and I already feel the disinterest. Old habits do die hard, so I guess I can watch it and take a nap.

I like it that the Manly man song Everyday is like Sunday by Morrissey is used to promote the manly manliness of watching football.

Politics the way I see it

Sarah Palin is hawt. No doubt this has been pointed out already. She is kinda like a Warrant video. Republicans are smart....It's like hey, check this chick out in roller skates and forget that this song errr i mean our policies really suck. Speaking of Palin, Winger has a song called Seventeen and Palin has a pregnant daughter that is Seventeen. hmmmm....connection?

Conjugal Visit Update

Some of you may recall my band Conjugal Visits. If not, please feel free to read up on our history here. We have been in the studio writing and finishing up on an album originally called After Execution. However, it became clear that as a great band we were missing something. The Who had Tommy, The Beatles had Sgt. Peppers, and Pink Floyd had The Wall...etc.etc....the bottom line is we needed to do a rock opera that could be a cool album that could be made into a broadway musical then released as a motion picture at some point when we needed the extra cash.

After much discussion and argument, we decided to not make a rock opera but something completely new. We realized that we could be the first band to create a "country opry", as we coin it.

Its about an evil doer named Kody Teith from the fictional state of Okrahoma that uses bad music, truck commercials, and ghey cowboy hats to control the minds of the people to promote war. We are hoping that not only will it sell as a protest piece, but also find an audience with the towel heads "over thare" in Arabia that will enjoy it as a stereotype of Americans.

The album is called For Unlawful Kountry Tunes